My Steampunk Short Story Pt. 1 // feat. lots of snark

by - 10:48 AM

(We're just pretending that I've had this post planned out for ages instead of me scrambling to come up with an idea the night before. *coughs*)

Hello, everyone! I'm back with a different kind of post today. I've seen some people do this before on their blogs, so I thought it would be fun to try it out.

As some of you may or may not know, I've been working on a short story over the past several months. (Yes, MONTHS--I got distracted by my new novel. :P) It isn't quite finished yet, but I thought I might try posting a section of it every week or two--like a serial story, almost. That is, if you guys like this first part and want to see more.

I haven't edited it that much so hopefully it's decent. THIS MAY BE A TERRIBLE IDEA I DON'T KNOW. (Especially since I haven't finished the darn story and may end up changing things as I go. #whyamidoingthis)

Anywayyyyy, I'm just rolling with it and giving you the first part of my steampunk story, which is currently untitled. BUT IT HAS SNARK. So there. XD

/ / /

It was the twenty-third of September, and that usually meant someone was going to die.

Granted, nobody ever thought it was going to be them. It usually ended up being a criminal or a politician . . . which was essentially the same thing.

However, this year, the city council chose an all-together different victim: my brother.

My older brother Aerick was a cartographer. We usually worked together on our voyages to the surrounding sky cities, with me piloting the airship as he charted the various terrains. He was very meticulous about his work and never left any details out of his maps. In fact, his map-making abilities were so astute that the queen honored him with the esteemed position of head cartographer of Legeria.

So imagine my surprise when they announced that he would be the one to die.

They took him away during the night, a rather unconventional time for the council to pick the unfortunate winner. When I headed to our airship the next morning, I expected to find Aerick in his cabin, poring over his maps as usual. But what I found instead was a note on his desk, written hastily to inform me of his “sudden absence.”

I was so furious that I nearly decided to try out my new pistol on the entire armed guard of Legeria. It was almost a shame I didn’t because their uniforms could only be improved by my bullets.

I gritted my teeth and crumpled the note in my hand, not even caring that paper was expensive. Rearing back my arm, I thrust the ball of paper at the door . . .

. . . Just in time to hit someone in the face.

By the muttered expletives and the wild brown hair, I already knew who it was. I didn’t, however, bother apologizing. He deserved it for filling my aviator goggles with mud anyway.

After Steel had composed himself somewhat, he picked the paper weapon off the floor and threw it back at me. “What was that for, Fiona?”

I smirked and scooped up the paper. “Let’s just say it’s part one of Operation Get Revenge on Steel.”

Although his real name was Edward, Steel had earned his nickname from the steely-eyed glares he often gave me when I didn’t cooperate . . . which was most of the time.

Steel returned my smirk and plopped down in Aerick’s desk chair. He leaned back and propped his feet on the desk. “Come on, aren’t you ever going to forgive me for that? It was over a month ago.”

I swatted at his dirty boots, more annoyed than usual at him for messing up my brother’s office. Hadn’t he even noticed Aerick was gone? Insensitive, unobservant slob.

He cocked an eyebrow at me but didn’t press me to give an answer. Taking his feet off the desk, he glanced around the room. His brows furrowed as he turned to face me. “Where’s Aerick? Does he have the morning off?”

I sighed and angrily shoved the note back in Steel’s hands. He uncrumpled the paper, and I saw his jaw clench as he read.

“He's the execution victim?” he said, confusion and anger written in the lines on his forehead. “Why?”

I ran a hand through my knotted blonde hair, so much like Aerick’s. “It doesn’t make sense. Either Aerick did something to offend the queen when he entered her service or . . .”

“Or the queen’s gone mad,” Steel finished.

I swallowed, allowing his words to sink in. The queen had been acting odd lately. Well, odder than usual. It seemed her methods of justice had become skewed, and the mysterious death of the king had been shrouded with suspicion. Not only that, but she had banned sugar from the city. That was one of the worst crimes I could fathom.

Steel propped his head on his hand thoughtfully. “Well, I do know one thing for certain.”

I glanced at Steel, already knowing what he was going to say. He grinned and wiggled his eyebrows. “We’re going to crash the queen’s birthday party.”

/ / /

Well? What did you think? I know I've been sharing a lot of my writing lately (SORRY) but I just kind of ran out of ideas and needed a quick post. (Plus, this story is a lot of fun and I wanted to share it.)

Would you like me to do a second part sometime? (I might chicken out and not share it because reasons.) Do you have any posts that you would like to see on my blog? GIVE ME YOUR IDEAS. Ahem...please. XD

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  1. OMW, the first sentences literally DREW. ME. IN. and I love it! I love your characters spunk and sarcasm. YES, I totally wanna see part two!

    1. EEEK THANK YOU I'm so glad you liked it. :D (And I have a hard time drawing people in by first sentences so I'm glad it did the trick. ;))

  2. I almost screamed when I saw the title of this post because SNARKY MARY STORY-WORDS, YES. And THOSE FIRST LINES. I would buy a book with first lines like that. This was SO EPIC, you need to write MORE! :D

    ~ Savannah @ Scattered Scribblings

    1. OMW YOU ARE THE BESTTTTT. *hugs* Thank you so much, Sav!! I'm thrilled that you liked it. ^_^

  3. :O :O :O :O :O :O



    I...I CAN'T.

    *collapses from all the brilliant amazingness*

    Seriously, Mary, I was glued to the screen from the first line to the last, and then screaming internally for mooooooooooore! Because AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I LOVED THIS.

    The style is PERFECTION. All the snark. And it's STEAMPUNK which is one of my favoritest things and there's not nearly enough of it in my life. And just...YOUR WRITING. I mean, DAT FIRST LINE. And then, "It usually ended up being a criminal or a politician . . . which was essentially the same thing." <--I can't. XDDD I. AM. IN. LOOOOVE with the main character's voice!

    I honestly wish I could fully express how much I enjoyed this. There just...there are no words! YOU ARE SO TALENTED. YOU BETTER POST MORE BECAUSE I NEEDED IT LIKE YESTERDAY. And I am ALWAYS ecstatic when you post any of your writing. You're so witty and hilarious and brilliant and just GIMME ALL THE MARY WRITING. PLEASE. POST MOOOOORE.

    (Oh, one thing. This is probably because I'm an oblivious jellyfish, but I wasn't sure if the MC was a male or female... But I probably just missed something. Also, I was wondering if when Steel walks in he should address the MC by his/her name since I don't think a name is mentioned either...? But that's purely a suggestion! And again, knowing me I just missed it all. #ObliviousReader)

    NOW GIVE US MORE. *holds up cookies while giving you puppy dog eyes*

    1. *makes incoherent squealing sounds* OH MY GOODNESS, CHRISTINE, YOUR COMMENT IS THE SWEETEST. I was literally blushing as I read it because goshhhh you're the best. <333

      I'M SO GLAD YOU LIKED IT!!!! I worry (way too much) about my writing being mediocre or not as funny as it sounded in my head. XD EEEEK I'M JUST SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW.

      Just..*I* don't have the words right now. You've blown me away with your sweet encouragement once again, dear Lauri. <3

      (Ah, thank you so much for saying something! That's totally not you being oblivious--I had this preconceived notion of my character in my head so I didn't even think to say the gender of the character early on. #mybad Her name is Fiona, which I mention a few hundred words later in the story. But thank you so much for pointing that out because I really should make that clear earlier on! :D)

      I don't know how I can resist cookies OR puppy dog eyes. ;)

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  5. This is SOOOO awesome, Mary!! You absolutely HAVE to write more!! :-)
    Hey I was wondering, is it all right if I link to Silver Horizons on my blog? I was doing a post that I had gotten the idea for off of your blog and wanted to link to it so my readers could check it out, but I wanted to make sure that was alright with you first! (Wow, I worded that strangely. Hope you can interpret it. :-))

    ~Skylar Reese

    1. ACK THANK YOU, SKYLAR! *hugs* I'll have to think about sharing the next part if it's decent enough. ;)

      D'awww, that is so sweet of you to ask! Absolutely, feel free to link to my blog! Oh, and what is your blog, by the way? I'd love to see your post. :D (Have no fear, I've worded things MUCH more strangely that that. I had no trouble figuring out what you were saying. ;))

    2. Yes, you should TOTALLY post it!!! I would love getting to read it!!
      Well, my blog is actually private, but if you give me your e-mail address I can invite you!! I just have to warn you though, I hardly ever post. :-)
      I just read on your post before this that you recently had a recital!! Violin, right? What song did you play? :-) I'm so jealous, I love getting to perform!! But I'm going to have to wait FOREVER for the next recital...... :-( Any chance you could maybe, maybe, maybe post a video?? It's totally alright with me if you don't want to, but I thought I might as well ask. :-) (Forgive me for my interrogative-ness, I'm always quite excited when I know someone else who plays violin.:-))

      ~Skylar Reese

    3. *cough* I think I have Mary's email address, Sky, so I can give it to you and help you invite her if Mary so wishes *cough* ;)

      ~ Savannah @ Scattered Scribblings

    4. @Skylar *grins* Maaaaybe. We shall see ;)

      Lol, I'd GLADLY let you take my place in the recital if you wanted. XD Performing is one of my least favorite things ever because I get major stage fright. Thankfully, this recital went a *little* better than last time. ;) The piece I played was called La Folia by Corelli. I probably won't post the video my mom took since it cut off like a minute into the program. #oops Maybe sometime I'll get the courage to share some of my violin playing, though. :D (And no problem--I love chatting violin stuff!)

      @Sav Such a stalker. *shakes head* XD (Actually, that works perfect. I kind of didn't want to share my email publicly on my blog, so if you would give it to Skylar for me, that would be great. ^_^)

  6. Eep! MARY (hah, autocorrect made it in caps).

    I love it so much! Please, please, please continue sharing your stories!

    1. Lol, apparently everyone is always shouting at me so autocorrect does the same. ;P

      Thank you so much!! I'm so glad you liked it, and I'll definitely have to think about sharing the next part. :)

  7. I would love to see the next part!!! Ha ha, this situation is very similar to mine. I'm due for a post tomorrow and oh my goodness I realized i hadn't worked on it AT ALL. 😝 So... I'm getting away with a few mini reviews and an announcement. 😉 Snippets and stories are always good ideas if you're behind. (says the blogger who has been trying to get up enough nerve to post a story on her blog for WEEKS. 😒)

    1. Ahhh, thank you so much, Zane! Haha, that happens to me a lot. :P Sometimes you just have to come up with ideas spur-of-the-moment when your posting days creep up on you. XD

      By the way, welcome! I don't think I've officially introduced myself, but I've seen you around Goodreads a little. ^_^

    2. Thanks! Yes, you probably have. I don't think I'm following you but I'm sure we run in the same circles. 😊

    3. I think so! Anyway, it's nice to meet you, Zane! :)

  8. FABULOUS. I will take an entire series please. Thanks ever so much. XD
    Love the snark. ;)

    1. Omw, you are awesome. THANK YOU!! :D (Snark is my faveeee.)

  9. Wow!!!!!!!! This is DIFFERENT. (Different for me, I mean, I've never read steampunk before *hides*) But it's so cool and snarky and fun--I love it! KEEP GOING PLEASE. I want to see how many more insults Fiona and Steel can trade before they realize that they . . . um, y'know :-P

    1. I'm pretty new to steampunk, too, since I've only ever read two or three books that classify as such. They were SO much fun, and now I'm wanting moreeeeeee. EEEK THANK YOU!!! There's a pretty high demand now so I might have to continue the story. ;)

      Ahem...yes, I know exactly what you mean. XD

  10. Are you sure you didn't edit this?? ;) Seriously, Mary, your writing is awesome! It has an excellent flow to it and it kept me engaged the whole way through. Really, Mary. YOU'RE A GOOD WRITER. DON'T EVER DOUBT THAT. :D (Which actually sounds rather silly to say because if you're anything like me you're going to doubt it anyway...but hey. JUST DON'T. ;))

    The queen is seriously mad though!! What even. Killing someone as a means of celebrating her birthday?! She's dreadful. Go Steel and Fiona! Smash that party up good!! :D

    Your line about criminals and politicians though. Hahaha. Perfection. ;D

    Do write more. And share it with us! I think the idea of a continuing story is so much fun!! :)

    1. Wellll, I edited it a little bit, but not that much. ;) ACK THANK YOU SO MUCH! That really means a lot. (Even though, yes, I'm a lot like you and end up doubting my writing about 90% of the time SO YEAH. XD)

      Yeahhhh, there are definitely issues in their city. Thank goodness Steel and Fiona are professional party-smashers. ;P

      Hehe, thanks. ;D

      Thanks again, Miss March! Your comment made me grin a lot!

  11. UM. WELL. EXCUSE ME, I'M CRASHING THE PARTY. *gives this the official Jonny-stamp-of-approval* I'm not leaving until you write and post part 2 just fyi xD

  12. This was EPIC. Of course you must give us mooooooooore. Otherwise my pet dragon's wrath will fall on you FULL FORCE. So.

    Please. I await part two eagerly. ;)

  13. Oooo, yes! This is awesome! I'm dying to know what happens. So, wrote more *points to quill and parchment on the desk*

  14. This was so fun, I really enjoyed it. Your writing is always so smooth and easy to read. The beginning was great, it sucked me right in! Your ending was lovely too, I think I'd like Steel--if I could get used to him. =)

    Don't you dare apologize for sharing your writing, this is what story-makers do!! I love getting to read your writing.

  15. This was a fantastic little writing blurb, Mary! You had me smirking right from the second paragraph. Fiona does indeed have a healthy amount of snark to her. XD

    You should keep posting more parts! I noticed you posted a second part, so I'm gonna go check that out right away. But I just thought I'd let you know that this is a really cool story idea. Keep up the good work!

    Oh, and I didn't realize at first that the MC was a girl either. :P I assumed it was a guy for some reason. But anywho, I need to keep reading! :D


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